What is the point?

What is the point in this blog?

The point is to get my emotions off of my chest, so they don't rule my life.  The point is that maybe one person will see this and be able to relate with me.  The point is there may be no point, but it is here and it is real. 

This is a place that I can release my emotions without burdening or depressing those around me.  I have a family to take care of, a family to show my love and support.  They deserve the best me, but with my mother on the outside world again and my life in a completely different place, I am afraid she will be able to poison this life or that she will try to drag me down with her.  I want to believe that she can stay clean, I want to believe that her recovery is real, and not just a way for her to stay out of prison.  I want to believe that her two grand babies will be reason enough for her to want a better life.  I want to believe that I am enough support for her to make it. 

I want to let go and trust, but I can't.  She lost my trust when I was too young to even realize what trust was and it will take a long time to get that back.  I just want to understand everything I feel and everything that is trying to eat away at me.  I don't understand it, I just can't figure it all out, yet.  Perhaps this will help or at any rate it could be a complete waste of time, either way it is here.